020: Living a Self-Empowered Life – Coming Back to Self


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Staying grounded within ourselves for a life of Self-empowerment

Completely owning our thoughts and feelings is one of the most liberating things we can experience. Without a dependency on external events to make us feel a certain way we are empowered to create a life driven and validated completely from our Selves. But it’s difficult to feel self-empowered without a grounded foundation within our Selves.

In this episode I look at how we can develop our Self-integrity and trust so we can begin owning our inner-experiences and removing our sense of value from the outcomes of external events.

Show Highlights and Takeaways

  • When we see an event unfolding before us it’s easy to connect our feelings to the external event and believe that it is the event which is making us feel this way instead of our own feelings.
  • Our thoughts and feelings are ours. They don’t belong to anyone else.
  • When we completely own our internal experiences we no longer seek to blame any external event (person, place or thing) for how we’re feeling.
  • Building a strong sense of Self is about listening to what’s going on inside you and honouring what you find with affirmative action.
  • It is the action which is important. By taking action we are saying, “Yes, my inner-experiences (thoughts and feelings) are important.”
  • Every time we take affirmative action for ourselves we are building trust for ourselves, and our ability to take care of ourselves.
  • When we don’t take action on what we are aware of within our Selves, our Self-trust weakens as we are ignoring how we feel.
  • If we don’t trust that we can take care of ourselves it’s easy to look toward external sources to take care of us, instead
  • We can be with our thoughts and feelings simply by being with them. Not having a preference for the feelings which are there to go away or become stronger – we can simply be with whatever is there and watch it pass away when it does.

Coming Back to Our Selves

  • There are different ways we can return to our inner-experience and strengthen our sense of Self-trust and integrity.
  • Stop looking in the mirror – For 7days stop using a mirror to check if you’re still looking good or not. If you do need to use a mirror, use it functionally. (checking if your face is clean, etc.)
  • Spend dedicated time with your Self – Take 1 hour out of your week to do something you love. No one else is allowed to come with you. Make a short list of some of the things you would like to do. If you’re really stuck, just take yourself for a walk in nature.
  • Give your Self the space and time to complete tasks – Listen to when you would like to complete a task. You don’t always need to react immediately to incoming text messages, phone calls, emails. Give yourself the permission to take action when you’re ready. You’re allowed.

The Podcast

The B is for Being Podcast is a collection of conversations with friends, psychologists, and thought-leaders on the most effective tools for uncovering authentic expression and navigating the obstacles we may encounter on the way to discovering ourselves.

About Benjamin

Hi, I’m Benjamin. I podcast and blog about authentic expression and self-discovery. I also make slow-videos for rest and reflection. You can read more about me here.

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