051: Why I Started Keeping a Compliments Journal


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A short episode outlining the benefits of recording the compliments we receive.

After realising how much negative self-talk I was doing, I went searching for some ways to bring more positivity back into the picture.

I didn’t expect that writing down the compliments I received would have such a great effect on my self-worth and provide me with a source of support during times of intense self-doubt.

In this episode, I let you know why I started keeping a compliments journal and how it’s allowed me to receive the nice things people say about me, while simultaneously reducing my bias towards self-negativity.

Show Notes

Click on a time marker to hear the full podcast

I Have a Hard Time Receiving Compliments 01:15

  • After I had started keeping a compliments journal, I found it became easier to accept the compliments given to me.
  • I would diminish the value of compliments I received by saying, “Other people can do the same thing. I’m not that special.”
  • By doing that, I’m telling the other person that I am not receiving their compliment. I do this because I don’t feel worthy of receiving such high praise.

Challenging My Level of Self-Worth 02:31

  • I carry a lot of self-worth in certain areas of my life, but in others, my level of self-worth feels very low.
  • In areas of low self-worth, it’s very difficult for me to accept compliments from others.
  • I confront my current level of self-worth every time I write down a compliment.
  • It felt awkward when I first started writing compliments down. However, the act of writing down a compliment began to familiarise me to receive them.

How to Keep a Compliments Journal 04:23

  • I recommend writing down the compliments in a small notebook.
  • Write down every compliment you receive.
  • When you receive a compliment, write down:
    • The compliment
    • Who gave it to you
    • The context in which you received the compliment
    • The date

Why I Started Keeping a Compliments Journal 06:00

  • When the level of my negative self-talk became too much for me, I decided something needed to change.
  • I realised I wouldn’t tolerate someone else talking so negatively to me, so why do I talk that way to myself?
  • At that point, keeping a compliments journal seemed like a good choice to address my self-negativity.

The Benefits 07:22

  • There are multiple benefits which begin to occur as a result of keeping a compliments journal.
    • Your current level of self-worth will be challenged and expanded.
    • When you’re going through self-doubt, it serves as a potent reminder of the value you already have inside you.
    • It balances out a bias towards self-negativity by also reminding you of the positive things people are saying about you.

Mentioned in This Episode

The Podcast

The B is for Being Podcast is a collection of conversations with friends, psychologists, and thought-leaders on the most effective tools for uncovering authentic expression and navigating the obstacles we may encounter on the way to discovering ourselves.

About Benjamin

Hi, I’m Benjamin. I podcast and blog about authentic expression and self-discovery. I also make slow-videos for rest and reflection. You can read more about me here.

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